I am not one for sitting still. I make a horrible patient. Free time is not so free feeling to me (I realize now that this is an issue I must work on – my Nook and lazy Sundays are helping).
Since school has ended, I’ve found myself with ample free time – more than I have ever had. For the most part, I realize how valuable this is – how envious others are of my “lazy days.” Except that this is not a vacation – at all.
While I have time to stop and enjoy the small things, take a bit longer in the grocery store, read a new book, or just take a nap – hanging over my head have been some big changes. Namely the need to find a job – and be able to contribute my share to a partnership with Joe.
The urgency I’ve felt is not one that was purely for my own needs. I realized that beyond my small savings, I had another person who was counting on me. It is my turn to be the supportive cheerleader to Joe as he pursues his degree. While I spent my days applying to jobs, reaching out to professional networks, and following leads, I often felt at the mercy of time and computer systems (I mean does ANYONE read your online job applications!?). But in this time I have also learned another reason why I love Joe. His unwavering confidence – in me and by extension – us.
A few weeks ago I had an interview for a position at the local VA Hospital. I had one hour to prepare for the interview. And I knew very little about the position – except that it was the mack daddy for first jobs as a medical social worker. All went well, but I was still not sure – not confident in myself – that I would be selected. Joe’s response, “You will. They’ll pick you. They have to.” Well, they did. I am honored to serve our veterans as the newest inpatient social worker!
Joe’s certainty was not arrogant or boastful or even just because he was biased – it was said with factual authority. A lesson for me. He has had confidence in a lot of other things as well – like our relationship when faced with long-distance. I feel lucky to have a person confident in me when I feel dismayed or concerned. I will do my best to be a competent and trustworthy social worker for my patients. And as I’ll find myself holding out hope for my patients, I know Joe and I will do the same for each other throughout our life.
It’s good to feel confident in the choices you make – job and marriage alike 🙂